There are many people who'd be there just to bring you down; but your job isn't to wallow in self pity. Your job, is to go out there, and shine so so so bright, that your brightness overpowers the darkness they cast on you.
Yours Truly;
J o r d y n :) Officially 16 on 20th January 2013. God's child since 19 June 2011 and never regretting my decision. Exceptionally hyper and sometimes crazy. #woohoo
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Wonders
Sunday, January 20, 2013
" Trust God, He'll lead. " That's what I always tell others. But when I experience such situations myself, I realised, sometimes you might actually start doing the wrong things. You start asking God why. You start blaming others. You start pushing responsibility. Like tonight. On this very day. On my 16th. Im back to the same question I ask everyday on this day. " Why, why does it turn out like this. "
It really makes me wonder if my birthday is a cursed day. Things never really seem to go right in the end. Ultimately, things take a twist and I'm left helpless, broken. Last year, it was the alcohol incident. This year? It really starts to make me wonder if I should carry on celebrating my birthday anymore. It somehow never leads to something good. In the end, I lose something. I always do.
And I realised now that dad didnt care anymore. He didnt contact me, he didnt drop me a text. Nothing. Wow dad, your girl's 16. Your little girl's finally grown up, but you're not here to see it. You're not even here to wish me anything. Wow dad. You truly are amazing. Have you really forgotten about us? Or are you deliberately avoiding us? I dont know, and I dont want to know. But at the same time, I just wish I knew whether you still cared. But I guess not. Sorry dad, but your little girl's not little anymore. I think alot, Im mature enough to know. I just hope you're happier now. Even if that doesnt include me, or mum. We'll find our own happiness. A future where everyday will be filled with smiles.
But at the end of the day, I know that God's there for me. He's gonna lead me through, he's gonna be the one holding my hand and pushing me on. I just have to trust in Him. Trust - such a small word, but such a huge meaning behind it. I wish things were easier.
