There are many people who'd be there just to bring you down; but your job isn't to wallow in self pity. Your job, is to go out there, and shine so so so bright, that your brightness overpowers the darkness they cast on you.
Yours Truly;
J o r d y n :) Officially 16 on 20th January 2013. God's child since 19 June 2011 and never regretting my decision. Exceptionally hyper and sometimes crazy. #woohoo
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Disappointments?
Friday, October 19, 2012
Maybe not Dad, but Mom and grandma. One day, I'll make you both proud. One day, I'll make you both say the words " My daughter, my granddaughter does well too. " . It might not be soon, but I will. I won't disappoint you all anymore. Im sorry that I didnt perform well at all this year. I tried, but maybe Im just not the type for studying. But dont worry, I'll put in my best efforts. I'll improve. This time, it'll be a smile that I'll bring, and not a frown. This time, I'll make you both happy. Thank you all for everything. It's been hard on you guys. I may not be the best daughter or granddaughter, but I'll be the daughter and the granddaughter that brings smiles to your faces. Our family might not be what people hope for, but Im contented. Because I have a mom and a grandma that none can compare, and that has already long surpassed my longing for Dad. I wont say I hate him, but rather, I'd say Im numb to everything. 3 years is a long enough period of time for me to know that he no longer bothers. And its also long enough a time for me to become more mature. This, I assure you guys.
Sigh, L1R5 29. So much for studying hard and aiming for L1R5 18 and below. Who am I kidding? Its impossible with this amount of effort I put in. It might seem like I've already been working super hard, but maybe the harsh reality is that I'm just not doing enough. I wanted to do better than what I did for MYE, but I didnt.. In fact, I deproved. It kind of doesnt make sense that with studying, my results are worst. But I just know I have to work harder for the next exams. And this time, Im going to put in 101%. And hopefully, I'll do well. As a reward for myself. This holiday wont be one that's happy-go-lucky like the past anymore. This holiday, it'll be a time where I buck up and study. I'll catch up. In fact, I'll surpass average. Because I dont want to lag behind anymore. I want to be someone who performs up to her capability. I know I can, but its just not showing. And I know that with just effort, results will show. Besides, I have God. What more can I fear?
